Village Chronicles

No wink-wink, snicker-snicker for the study-abroad child. I know a lot of kids go there for a “blow off semester” and party/travel/barely study, but I think this one wants to keep the positive grades going for future use. She didn’t select any easy classes and she is very frugal with the money she earned, so hopefully Rome will be to study, learn about the area and meet people.

There already was a general Facebook invite from a boy who was traveling to Loyola, Rome and suggested a “pub crawl.” “Well, you could still go,” I countered, even if you don’t drink.” Her look told me otherwise. I know what it is like to be around drinkers when you don’t, and I must agree with her ‘look’ and surmise that it might not be something fun to do. Too bad that was the first Facebook suggestion for Rome. Sigh.

As for Brett, I know I don’t have to get up with him, but I like to. How long does this last—the morning chats over breakfast, the different lunches I try to make so it’s not boring. Isn’t that a parcel of life? I know there are moms who are glad their kids make their own, but I still like doing that part. A good friend of his used to bring Mountain Dew for lunch when he was just a fourth grader. Yikes! To me, that wasn’t a good choice, but the boy made his own lunch.

With the passage of time, you still worry about your kids, but the worries become scarier. Will they stay away from those kids who lack self-esteem and encourage your child to partake in drugs or alcohol? Will my child have the courage to say no? Will my child be able to maintain his or her own self without following the pack and possibly getting into legal trouble?

Despite careful consideration and discussion of boundaries, diligent positive examples and solid upbringing, kids will make mistakes and disappoint you. Once they learn a lesson, will that lesson stick? It’s a worry.

The school year started up with a bang at a certain Naperville High School where over a dozen students showed up at school (in the AM) intoxicated. Some had the (wink-wink) sleepovers, some stayed up all night and some imbibed in the morning—versions of what happened were all over the place. All I can say is, it makes you wonder. Thank goodness for the tipster who disclosed the event to school authorities. How many of those kids drove to school drunk? Different rules for different households I guess. Sigh.

I know I am a dinosaur because I still would call to see if parents were going to be home for a sleepover/party. There aren’t many of us who would so deem to embarrass their tender teenager. Apparently, I still do most times.

School is still full of unpleasant bullies and mean kids. Kids who think they are better than others because of their family wealth are there too, and then there are kids who just are normal and nice and do their own thing, not bothering with the drama that goes on.

I so admire the kids who don’t conform to a costume or a fake formula as they navigate high school. They are the cool ones to me. There are good teachers who love to teach and there are teachers who are mediocre - it usually balances out somehow.

One thing I know at this stage in my life as a parent, is that high school counselors are very important, and your child is lucky to get a good one. They can be so helpful in that all-important junior and senior year, and if you get a less-than-helpful one, complain. Yes, do it.

One of my kids had a counselor who would ask about their dating life and school gossip. Ladies and gentlemen, ahem, your tax dollars at work. This counselor also gave several students in a row the same college route to visit over spring break. They all had different majors in mind, so the choices did not make any sense. This particular one used that procedure quite a lot.

It was a case of being lazy, lacking individual research or follow up to really know the student. So we found a phenomenal counselor after asking for a switch. She is awesome and then some—totally skilled and proficient at what she does. And she is very nice.

The counselor role is designed to aid your student through a maze of questions and choices; to counsel your child, not inquire about gossip. Seniors are lucky to get a good one, and many parents have complained about the lack of really good ones. Surveys would help weed out the idle ones, perhaps?

This school term will be unique—no two are ever the same. There will be assignments done at the last minute (dislike that!) group projects (despise those!) and long-distance conversations, a possible trip to Rome for me and Brett and hopefully, no drama.

I am wishing for good teachers, interesting classes for the kids, and a couple of snowstorms—love those snow days. Thinking about those in 88-degree heat is just downright sad, but it is always a possibility.